This is something I’ve recently come to realize and admit about myself. Yep, I’m just a big, smothering, overbearing mother when it comes to romantic relationships.
You’re hungry-let me make you something to eat. You don’t feel well-let me get you a blanket and stroke your head. You had a bad day-let me hold you and make it better. When does being a caring partner turn into becoming someone’s mom? If this is something you find yourself contemplating, this may be a warning sign that you’re parenting your romantic partner.
Do you really want to see your partner as a child that needs to be coddled? Do they really want to see their partner as a mother whose expectations they’re trying to live up to?
“How did I become a motherer?” one might ask. Well, I believe I learned this trait from my own mother, who is the quintessential caregiver. Always putting everyone else’s needs before her own to make sure everyone is content. How we behave in life often mirrors what we learn from our parents, which is what they’ve learned from their parents, etc, etc. I feel most significant when I’m taking care of other people.